As humans we all have one need that someone else has to fill, that need is love. As young children we seek the love of our parents, as we grow we add the love of friends and soon someone of the opposite sex. Once we find that “one” who can fill that love, we marry, and spend the rest of our lives loving them. While this is great… I’m learning that we all love in different ways. Dr. Gary Chapman is the author of “The 5 Love Languages” and in his book he sheds light on what the 5 love languages are as well as how to love based on those languages.
Well, I’ve learned that I am primarily a Touch person. This means I love hugs, pats on the backs, a hand on the arm, and things like that. I also am a quality time person and words of affirmation. What that means is that I love one on one time with people and I love when people affirm me in what I do. I’m learning that when I’m not hugged or affirmed or when I don’t get time with people, I feel unloved. While I know deep inside I am loved, not getting that daily reassurance drains me.
I also have learned that I’m primarily an initiator in love, which is where things get tough for me. I often am the one who must speak or act first, if I don’t speak or act then there is no “i love you” or hug or such . This becomes hard for me. I”m not a very verbal person ( but I am working on that) so when I don’t speak up, I feel deprived of love.
I know I opened up a lot here, but whats your language? You can go to 5lovelanguages.com to figure it out.