The Hard Decision

I thought the ducks were in the row.

I thought I was set to go.

I had all the excitement in the world.

Then He slammed on the brakes.

Let me recap Monday & Tuesday for you.

Email to FinAid asking about PLUS loan, realize you did the wrong process, complete app for PLUS, DECLINE, seek help for extra funding, spend all day Tuesday applying for loans and be DECLINED, last hope- mom cosigner- DECLINE. 

Here it is Wednesday. I have spent the day emailing FinAid, calling the registrar, hearing back from other people, and breaking down to apply for a job.

Unfortunately the decision I had to make was this- withdraw from Berry for the term. This did not come easy. I exhausted every option I knew. God had a different agenda though. It wasn’t meant for me to be at Berry this fall. There are lesson’s He is wanting to teach me. So, I’m applying for jobs. I’m praying this one at my mom’s work holds.

In the past 24 hours I have cried, yelled, hit the pillow, felt like a failure, held back tears due to the fact I’m in public, prayed constantly, sought outside help, and finally came to some peace with myself.

This isn’t the end. I’m gonna finish. This is a detour on the path of life. It’s one of those things that you never prepare for but God has wrote into your life. I don’t know what the next 5 months of my life hold. I’m unsure about every step but I know God is walking with me.

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